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The Molested Catholic article #970 "My first 15 minutes as a good Christian" is presented courtesy of the FAQyMe Gene

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My first 15 minutes as a good Christian

Description: to fondle her breasts and to run my hands over her exquisite form. It only took me a moment before I was able to ask her if she


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What does it take to come back into the fold of Jesus, faith and the ability to forgive were the erudite words of the Bishop I had been conversing with.

If I learn humility and forgiveness, faith will follow. I found some difficulties, however he assured me that this was the path to enlightenment if I was to ever have a real chance to be accepted back into the flock after such a long time apart.

I decided to sleep on it to see how comfortable I felt, after all these were the words of a man skilled in religious philosophy and was effectively to me the summation or the accumulation of 2000 years of religious education - these simple steps were brought to me by the cream of the Catholic Church bringing me the words of God. There is no higher authority. These were the words of God simply being relayed to me by one of His most respected earthly representatives.

I have like so many others a desire to live on eternally and if this is to be the way to achieve that then I should take that up with all that is at my disposal and when I have mastered these things as the Bishop had said I may find myself being called by God to further his words to those who have yet to hear them.

This was quite a challenge for me in light of my past history with my church and like many other mysteries in life I felt that I should at least give it a try as the reward at the end of that would be culminated in my obtaining everlasting life - something truly worthy to me and something which the Bishop pointed out was the ultimate goal of all good Catholics.

It probably is not lost on many that a good nights sleep with something like this being put on the back-burner for the night and I would see how I felt in the morning.

I woke this morning and the word forgiveness was foremost in my mind. This was encouraging and it was going in much of the way the Bishop had said.

I felt that things may have been looking up and as I looked at my empty pack of cigarettes and felt my want for a morning mugachino I decided to treat myself a mugachino and to buy some cigarettes, (my smoking was something I had long had difficulty with over the myriad of times I had tried to give them up).

The Bishops words rang in my head and the earthly rewards he spoke of were things to aspire to. He had said that if I mastered these things I may find myself in a position where I could dedicate my life to God and perhaps even join the priesthood where I would be amongst the most ardent believers and if I achieved this state I would simply have a need to look after my soul as the church would look after my earthly body and its needs.

This was something I was grappling with as I went to my car - there were many thoughts passing through my head, I noticed the steel belt of the rear tyres of my car was protruding through and the canvas was showing, it was fairly simple to apply forgive to this when I realised that if I was picked up by a non-christian police officer for this I most likely would get a ticket, however knowing that they were in the minority according to the Bishops description that 1.2 billion believers inhabited the earth I was more likely to be stopped by a Christian policeman - a fellow believer and adherent follower of forgiveness, it would simply take a few words of God with him and all would be forgiven so I drove on.

Mine is an old vehicle as the bumps of life have not left me with a sufficient accumulation of wealth to be able to afford those new tyres or some of the other repairs my car was in need of.

It was raining and foggy as I drove out onto the street, the windscreen wipers suddenly stopped as they had done several times before in the wet weather and the speedo was reading maybe 15 to 20 kms out - as a new found believer in forgiveness it was logical to understand that any policeman who found fault with these things would be able to provide to me, a fellow Christian, the forgiveness that the Bishop had spoken of so I drove on with my arm out the window and wiped some of the water off the screen so I could see some of the road I was driving on safe in the knowledge that I might be able to get another 10,000kms from those tyres unless I had the misfortune to come across a non Christian policeman who would be by stint of the fact of his lack of faith be unable to forgive me.

I managed to maneuver my way to the local service station where I was headed for that mugachino. I had shed a great deal of concern already and felt that forgiveness of my own inability to give up cigarettes needed a moment so I forgave myself for that as well. I felt almost light headed as there was no guilt for me if I chose to buy more of them. I queued up to order my mugachino and cigarettes with this somewhat newfound knowledge and experience.

In the queue in front of me were some young people, 2 young girls about 20 and a young fellow, they were laughing and joking and having an enjoyable time. I looked at one of the girls and noticed how nicely her shorts looked on her and what beautiful legs she had from my position from behind her, when she turned sideways I could see that she also had beautiful breasts or at least the part I could see of them - they were absolutely tempting and my imagination ran on for a moment to image what it would be like to fondle her breasts and to run my hands over her exquisite form. It only took me a moment before I was able to ask her if she was a Christian. With a beatific smile she responded yes with a gush and knowing smile. I though this was fantastic that I had found a fellow believer so quickly and I at once realised here was a person who would be able to forgive me as other Christians do as a matter of their religion. I reached out and placed one of my hands on her breast and gently stroked it trying to find her nipple which was something that fascinated me while I put my other hand between her legs to feel the shape of her body underneath her tight fitting shorts - the sensations of doing that were most pleasurable and she simply stood there with those beautiful wide eyes and a half smile on her lips while not saying a word so I took that as acceptance of what I was doing and tried to find a way to permit my hands to touch the flesh of her body in those parts I found so pleasurable.

Things started to go a little awry at that point in time as amasingly I was attacked by her friends, who, even though they too were Christians they simply had not yet grasped the concept of forgiveness.

It was a somewhat confusing time as people began to shout all sorts of strange things and they must have even rung the police who arrived very quickly; I found many of them also to be of the Christian faith yet not a one of them offered me the forgiveness I had spoken with the Bishop about and I was treated so cruelly because of their inability to uphold this most basic tenet of their faith, I felt they were the ones who should sit down and have a good chat with the Bishop who I am sure would have been able to set them straight on this matter.

Eventually after a nightmare time in police custody where some shouted in my face such horrible words that had I not been able to forgive myself I may have had some terrible thoughts if I accepted their erroneous ways and their mis-interpretation of Gods words as relayed to me by the Bishop.

After another nightmarish period I was forcibly brought before a magistrate and was asked to swear on the Bible containing all the known word of God. I thought at last here is a place which must logically uphold this religious tenet as it began its proceedings with such a strong affirmation of the courts adherence to the faith and Christianity and I immediately understood that here to words of the Bishop would hold sway against all of those other Christians I had met so far this day and I would soon get over the shock of their inability to forgive - at least here I would be forgiven and I would be released and all would be well.

Now it is some years since this horrible day and I have endured a whole range of anti-Christian experiences including being locked up in a prison with so many common criminals. Never the less my faith is even stronger today than it was when I set out on my journey that morning and I know what the Bishop meant when he said I may find a calling from God to spread his word and to grow the faith and I resolved to join the priesthood on my release from this torment that had been forced upon me.  I knew with certainty that there simply was not enough forgiveness in the world and I should take up the task of spreading the word to as many as I could find who would listen to me.

It is comforting to know that this much needed work of the Bishops must go on until the rest of humanity understands the benefits society can reap when they do understand fully and actually put into practice the words of the Bishop when he said that my faith would be incomplete until I reached the point where I would be able to provide forgiveness no matter what crime was committed against me.

It is proving to be a long and arduous journey and I daily meet so many unbelievers, however there is a need to keep my faith strong and nothing that has been said to me has been permitted to shake my faith for a moment and I am grateful to the Bishop for his words of encouragement when he spoke of all the advertises that I might face if I chose to follow his path.

I have worked so hard at this that now I have a goodly number of fellow believers who have an absolute belief in the forgiveness that the church teaches that soon there will be enough of us believers that on our next visit to the service station for a mugachino even if there is another young girl there of such beauty I will have the support of my fellow Christians and this time it is hoped that we will receive the forgiveness which we are all entitled to. As the Bishop said, the words of God are not for man to question and the releasing of guilt one feels when you know you will be forgiven as it is preached will one day be available to us all for it not until then that we shall react true salvation in the eyes of the Bishop and his followers.

I was just looking at the tyres on my car and I think I might still get another few thousand kilometers from those as well which again supports the words of the Bishop when he said the Lord works in mysterious ways.

Now that I have met a wonderful young fellow who has had such a terrible time in his life and has suffered so much at the hands of non believers I feel that it is a duty of mine to bring the word of the Lord to him as he struggles so much with the Commandments of God that he seems confused over those things and it is my duty to my religion to bring the words of God and the Bishop to him. He is a very intelligent young man who feels such shame over his parentage and has lost his way particularly in regards the Fourth Commandment of honoring his father and his mother, how little does he realise that will haunt him forever until he can learn to forgive them in the way the Bishop described.

His tales of murder and rape and of corruption at the highest levels are truly shocking and makes yo weep and it is taking some considerable time to bring him around to a point where he is able to accept through forgiveness his need to follow this Fourth Commandment. He seems confused and argues persistently that it is most difficult to forgive his mother and father for the part they played in the deaths and rapes of some 50,000 children in his country of birth. How little he seems to understand that he can only be accepted into the kingdom of God when he learns how to forgive those who trespass against him and of the relief and the shedding of the guilt that comes with his inabilities for it is then and only then that he can truly be able to honor both his father and his mother for that is what salvation is about, that is the only true course for salvation and eternal life.

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